If you’re in a marriage or committed relationship and you’ve got a sneaking suspicion your partner is on the prowl, chances are you could be right.
Even if you don’t have a lot to back up that nagging feeling, it’s as likely you’ve clocked a whole raft of clues that signal something is awry.
David King, managing director for Lipstick Investigations, said a woman’s intuition is close to 80 percent spot on.
‘I will back a woman’s intuition every single time,’ he told FEMAIL.
‘There’s something in their minds that’s not right and some of the things they may come to me with might sound a bit strange but more often than not we investigate into it and they’re dead right.’
Here, FEMAIL takes a look at the signs to look out for if you suspect your significant other might be playing around.
SPOTTING BEHAVIOURAL CHANGES
While as many women are as likely to cheat – the investigation’s experts say figures are roughly even – his female clientele usually engage his services after their partners have exhibited some telling signs.
Ahead of anything, a man who is straying may start showing a shift in the way they behave, and this is generally connected to the way their appearance.
‘Men start to take a bit more care. They might work out a bit more, or be cleanly shaven more often, or start dressing a bit better or smelling nicer,’ David said.
‘A change of appearance is generally quite strong.’
SUSPICIOUS CELL PHONE USE
The investigations expert said technology has changed the playing field when it comes to cheating partners.
David said mobile phones are as often as not where a cheating spouse is likely to leave some evidence that an affair is in progress.
‘Suspicion starts coming through in technology.
‘You might see a message pop up in your partner’s iPhone that looks a bit weird, or he is more protective of his phone.
‘He may have put a password on it, whereas he never needed one before.’
UNEXPLAINED ANGER TOWARDS THE OTHER PERSON
While David said he’s not able to comment on the psychology of a cheating person, he did say that many of his clients report their partner seeming to be more angry than usual.
‘If men are guilty this can manifest itself as anger. Husbands will often manifest anger into a relationship, and this can sometimes work as a way to get out of the house.’
He explained that men behaving irrationally will pick fights which can then lead to an opportunity or excuse to leave the house under the belief they’re taking time to cool down.
REASONS FOR NOT BEING AT HOME
Husbands or partners who start to find endless excuses for not coming home, or needing to go out could be signaling something is going on, David said.
‘Men will come home late, or go out without their partner when they previously would have taken them with you.’
There are times when a partner might start out using a simple excuse such as wanting to go for a walk, that may turn out to be as big a red flag as any, especially if this behavior seems incongruous.
‘He [the husband] could be going for a legitimate walk but it sounds strange in their relationship,’ he said.
CATCHING A PARTNER IN THE ACT
Although there are ways to track a partner’s internet activity or gather other evidence such as combing through credit card bills to spot any unusual activity, catching someone in the act often means bringing in a professional.
David, who has 20 years’ experience as a private investigator, said his company’s main service is gathering visual documentation that shows a person has been unfaithful.
‘It’s getting the proof of the infidelity on film.’
He said the work of an investigator is about catching out the person’s lie, ‘They said we’re going to point A and they’ve ended up at point B with somebody else.’
Most of David’s results come from conventional surveillance, which includes the use of forensic tools, hidden cameras and night vision equipment.
SENDING IN A HONEY TRAPPER
A honey trapper is where a decoy is sent into a favorite watering hole or gym to flirt with a partner to see what happens next; it catches out infidelity before it even happens, David explains.
While that might have been a preferred method of catching out a potentially unfaithful partner, it’s not one the expert recommends.
‘People have quite unrealistic expectations of how it [honey trapping] works,’ he said.
‘If clients want the service I try to talk them into surveillance as a preferred option as it is going to give them the same answers.
‘I’m not saying it’s morally wrong, but it’s not my preferred direction.’
Overall David said 80 percent of his investigations are successful, but said this would be higher if money wasn’t an issue.
‘If you have suspicions they are generally warranted,’ he concluded.
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