It was just another day, coming back from school, thinking what teenagers think about. I was waiting to cross the road with a few other people. The light turned green (for pedestrians), but everyone waited because there was an oncoming tram – except for this old lady, a nun. She came forward, and I knew she was going to die if I don’t do something. I grabbed her by the arm, pulled her from behind and we crashed on the sidewalk, both unharmed. Everything after that is blurry, I remember people asking me am I alright, this nun saying “God bless you, thank you!” but I was frozen. I couldn’t speak, people are now asking me if I’m alright, somebody wanted to call the hospital, and I somehow said I’m okay.
I didn’t feel like a hero. I was confused. So confused. If I were 1-2 seconds late, I’d be dead! Or at least that old lady would be dead. I was in the state of shock. I always thought I was a cold person. At the time I was 18, I was doing recreational drugs almost every day. I had no dreams, no aspirations. My life was a mess, every little thing about me was wrong, I hated my life and this world. I was never good at anything but suddenly – I was a hero.
The next few weeks I spent thinking about why was I the only one who jumped to save that nun. There were people around me closer to her, in a better position, but they were standing still, shouting: “Watch out!” Aren’t those people better than me? I thought I lacked emotion, lacked empathy. I hated people, especially religious people, so why did I risk my life to save something I hate? Was it a reflex? No, other people would react before me. I was thinking about it so intensely, but I simply couldn’t find a logical answer. It just wasn’t logical. From that realization on, I was changed forever.
I stopped and took a look at myself and was wondering what the heck am I doing with my life. This wasn’t a way to happiness. I took my life in order, went to college and 3 years later I’m doing awesome. Every day is a fight; it’s a constant struggle. Life is hard, it’s a bottomless pit of despair, but it’s also an open sky of opportunity. Now and then, I get depressed and wonder if I can take it if I can carry the weight of the world and then I remember that I once saved a life.
That day, I saved 2 lives – hers and mine.
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